Top Ten Words by Alain Brix-Nielsen
TOP TEN STRANGE WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST IN THE ENGLISH
LANGUAGE BUT SHOULD
- AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks'
trus) adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub
faucet on and off with your toes.
- CARPERPETUATION (kar' pur
pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over
a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times,
reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then
putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.
- DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt')
v. To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the
floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow remove
all the germs.
- ELBONICS (el bon' iks) n.
The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in
a movie theater.
- FRUST (frust) n. The small
line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan
and keeps backing a person across the room until he
finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
- LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to
man gyu lay' shun) n. Manhandling the "open
here" spout on a milk container so badly that one
has to resort to the 'illegal' side.
- PEPPIER (pehp ee ay') n. The
waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole purpose seems to
be walking around asking diners if they want ground
pepper.
- PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n.
The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting
whom you were calling just as they answer.
- PUPKUS (pup' kus) n. The
moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its
nose to it.
- TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras
tin ay' shun) n. The act of always letting the phone ring
as least twice before you pick it up, even when you're
only six inches away.
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Last edited: 05/22/02